Whoops.

There was a parade downtown today. I thought I was going to be on top of things for once. I looked up the parade route but didn't really take the time to fully absorb the route. So I drove right into it on my way to open the gallery. I had to abandon the car and walk down. Fortunately, I was wearing walking shoes. Once I got to the studio, however, I put everything down and went to see the parade.

I have not produced anything today but I did do some business brainstorming and came up with a couple of ideas to get the word out about Kat Schneider Studio/Gallery. I'm showing you a figure painting I did last week. I took a drawing that I didn't like so much so that if I muffed it, I wouldn't feel so bad. The more I look at the resulting painting, the better I like it. My ultimate goal is not to do life-like portraits, but I'm not sure where I'm going. I am driven to draw the human form. Why? To what purpose? Maybe it's to figure out who I am and what my place is in the scheme of things.

Nebulae.

I worked on a figure drawing to begin with today because I'm afraid of feeling incompetent and the only way to get over that is to power through the feeling and practice so that I get better.

After that, I gave myself permission (isn't all this angst fascinating?) to play with some more small paintings. They are works of art in their own right but because they are smaller, I'm am not so intimidated. I can have fun while I work out ideas and see what works. I'm now ping ponging, yes that's the technical term, from big works to small ones and back again.

Nebulae are star forming areas in space where gas, dust and other material bunch up, attract more material as they gain mass. They are incipient stars. My paintings are in the process becoming something more, as are my capabilities as an artist and well rounded human being.

Kathleen Faulkner, who I've been following at kathleenfaulkner.blogspot.com stopped by my studio/gallery, and we spoke for a bit. Her blogs are picturesque and poetic as is her work. It was fun to see a real person.

Kristen Gilje stopped by as well. She may be showing at my gallery this fall. In the meantime, check out her blog kristen-gilje.blogspot.com.

Keepin' on, keepin' on.

This painting is the red-headed stepchild. No matter what I do, I cannot make it behave.

In an earlier entry, I thought people might enjoy guessing what it was about. I had thought the central object resembled a wing and wanted to call it "Flight" which I may still do, because it reminded me of the flight of Iccarus (I can't remember if an 's' gets an apostrophe and another 's' or what). Unfortunately, I'm beginning to feel that this painting isn't even getting off the ground. The photo looks better than real life because all my struggles to make something of it are blurred.

I'm feeling more confident in what I'm doing, not in response to any sales, but if I'm going to put my work in front of the viewing public, I may as well do it right.

An appropriate painting.

Work in progress.

My paintings seem to be getting a little surreal. No one, nary a sole, came into the gallery today. I figured out how much this little venture will cost me, if I'm lucky. I've decided to sign a month to month lease so we'll see just how unreal my life is going to get.

As for the subject of this painting, I seem to have harkened back to my high school days, when I was interested in Greek mythology. Any guesses as to what the subject of this painting will be?

Abstract Expressionism is about the painter expressing her subconsciousness. However, I've never felt that I stand in front of my easel and emoting all over the canvas. When painting, I'm thinking of technical things, for instance, composition or what colors will complement each other. When I begin a painting, I am not thinking, today I am frustrated with the postman so I will paint angrily.

 I realized halfway through the painting what it reminded me of, and since writing this blog and talking about my new enterprise, I have realized just how appropriate this painting is. Every painter seems to have some brilliant rationalization for their practice while I have been channelling my inner Jackson Pollock (de Kooning was better about talking about art than was manly Pollock). Today, in this blog, I have been finally able to articulate my practice. This is quite the break through blog entry.

Underworld Deities.

Madea's Choice, mixed media on paper, 40"x25"

Madea helped Jason on his quest to get the Golden Fleece. One legend says that she killed her brother, cut up his body and threw it on the islands as the Argo passed knowing that her father would stop to pick up the pieces allowing Jason to escape. Another legend says that her brother was killed when pursuing Jason. Jason later left her for a younger richer woman and Euripedes writes that she murdered her children in revenge when earlier legends say that other people did it.

Male writers through the ages have been sympathetic to Jason's plight and painted Madea as a criminal. Naturally, I feel sympathy for her. She couldn't get her own boat to sail off and have adventures. She was dependent on someone to help her. She relied on Jason for survival and he let her down, perhaps for his own survival.

This painting is about her choice to leave home and go adventuring, before she had to pay the price for her unfeminine desires. I imagine the open sea before her, the wind in her hair and the prospect of freedom.